How Did We Make Meatloaf Before This

Because we are tired, and we've put up with it long enough. Why, for the love of the Earth, do we have to deal with meatloaf falling apart for one more family dinner? It has been an often ignored, but crucial issue for the American family unit. If I had a dime for every dinner ruined by my parents fighting as a DIRECT result of the meatloaf being less-than-perfect, I would have at least $.75. There was one time that I wasn't sure it was the meatloaf that was the issue, so I'm only giving that one $.5. Ah, but I digress. Look, I'm tired of meatloaves cooking unevenly too. This thing fixes that with special Swedish (yes, Swedes eat things other than meatballs) technology that circulates air to all the parts of the loaf. Or something like that. Whatever it does it makes a perfect loaf and it will save your marriage. So get it. Or don't and take your chances. If you're a fool that's your problem. If you're a vegetarian or vegan then you probably aren't married anyway so, yea be happy alone or whatever you do.

Finally, an Easier Way to Crack Open Eggs!

Because we like pastries here in the US of A! And it's very difficult to make a good pastry without eggs, no matter what your vegan coworker says. She's anti-brownie but you don't have to be! Vegans are destroying the planet with their anti-egg crazy... but that's another story. Here's the thing: cracking eggs is nearly impossible. You have to like drop an egg on the floor to get that sucker to break. Once you finally get through that thick shell you're confronted with all kinds of hazards. It takes a near genius to figure out how to crack an egg without getting a piece of shell in the yolk. You know how many cake mixes I had to toss because of a piece of eggshell? Like two of them! It's ridiculous! Don't even start me on separating the white out. Thank Hey Zeus that the EZCracker has a special attachment that will do that for you. Now even your aunt with the giant man hands will be able to crack an egg easily. This thing was a long time coming.